Some Days are Reminders.

Teaching is full of extremes. Some days, you come home feeling like a mess. You sit on the bus feeling frustrated, your back sore and your voice even worse. A toddler on the bus begins wailing, and as you slip in your headphones, you wonder what strange force compelled you to work with kids. 'Why would anyone wish this on themselves?' you think. But then, miraculously, you have days that remind you exactly why.

It's 8:02 AM and I'm sitting on a bench downtown, thinking that the possibility of me working today is getting slim. But then my phone rings. "Hello!", my agency contact says in a chipper voice. "We've got no calls in today for primary supply teachers...but I'd still like to send you out to a school to help out in a classroom -- you're getting paid as part of your guaranteed work agreement, even though we're sending you for free. Is that okay with you?" "Sure, sounds good" I tell them. Work is work, even if it's not technically work... and anyway, it's good to get my face out there and better than sitting at home.

The assignment is Year Six -- equivalent of Grade Five back home. We talk about Remembrance Day, write letters to role models, and I help some small groups with math -- practical problem solving where they have to figure out which (made-up) cell phone plan is the cheapest. The kids are funny, and have tons of questions about Canada and my accent. The morning flew by pleasantly, but it was the afternoon that really got me.

In the afternoon, the students had PSHE -- Personal, social and health education. To sum it up in the most basic terms, this subject revolves around being kind to yourself and others. Today, the topic was disability. The students pushed their desks back and sat in a circle, and the teacher introduced the talking point: we were to go around the circle, and students could choose to share either a disability that they knew about, or talk about someone in their life that has dealt with disability in some form.

We began passing around a stuffed animal as a sort of "talking stick", and the students began sharing. One by one, they told stories in small voices about friends and family members who had been affected by disability or life-altering illness -- some still living and some not. It became clear very quickly that some of these students had dealt with some pretty heavy things at the age of 10 and 11: parents with brain damage, grandparents with dementia, seeing beloved family members battle with injury and illness. But amazingly, despite how chatty this group was earlier, not a single voice could be heard speaking out of turn. These children understood the seriousness of the discussion and sat in respectful silence for their friends who were sharing.

As the discussion went on, I noticed some eyes welling up with tears. Emotions can be such tricky things. Even as adults, we sometimes find it difficult to know how to handle the strong emotions of our friends, and can feel really uncomfortable when we see someone we know crying. But these children knew exactly what to do. I saw students rubbing their friends backs to comfort them, arms around shoulders, quiet acts of kindness. When the discussion ended, I noticed one girl starting to tear up, unnoticed by her peers. When a boy finally noticed, he raised his hand and said "I think Katie needs a tissue" in a concerned voice. Now I was struggling to hold back tears.

"I just wanted to say, thank you all so much for sharing." the teacher said. "You are all brave boys and girls, and some of you have dealt with some very tough things. But look around you. In this class, and at this school, we are like a family. If you ever feel sad or upset, you can talk to me, or any adult here, or any of your friends around you... we are all here to listen. You're not alone." His words were sincere. I felt it, and I could tell the students did too.

As I walked home that day, I thought: "This is it. This is why I wanted to teach". To me, being a teacher is about creating a safe and welcoming space for children to learn. A place where they feel accepted, and where they are unafraid to express themselves. I was reminded that day that every student is experiencing life in a different way, and their experience goes far deeper than what you see at school. Yes, it takes less time to scold a student for bad behaviour than to pull them aside and ask: "I noticed you seem troubled today. What's bothering you?". But you would be surprised what you can learn from the latter. Yes, sometimes kids are just being kids...but sometimes their parents are fighting, or their grandma is sick, and they don't know how to properly deal with their fear and anger. It can be hard to give them the benefit of the doubt when it can feel like they are purposefully doing everything in their power to drive you up a wall...but it's so important to try.

Teachers can't solve every problem for every child -- that would be an overwhelming and impossible task. But we can listen and encourage. We can provide helping hands and shoulders to cry on. We can be on a child's team when they feel like the world is against them. And sometimes, that is enough.


-- C

Supply Teacher Problems: All Dressed Up and Nowhere to Go

I've got my teacher clothes on: A smart pair of black dress pants (trousers for any Brits reading), a nice blouse, and a comfy cardigan. My purse is packed with lunch, my day planner, an umbrella, my police check, a water bottle, and some animal stickers. Yes, I am totally prepared. Prepared to sit on my bed, on my laptop, sadly eating dark chocolate soy pudding. As one might guess, my morning didn't go exactly as planned.

Supply teaching is great for many reasons: The spontaneity. The flexibility. A new challenge every day. It can also be quite frustrating for a few reasons: The instability. The unpredictability. A new, potential Google Maps disaster every day. I try to focus on the positives, and enjoy the amazing opportunity that I have been given. But it wouldn't be a blog without a little venting, right?
This morning, I got a call around 7:35 to get to a school that I've taught at a few times, and really like. This school is a bit far on the bus -- almost an hour, and that's if I leave at the right time to catch the most direct bus. However, you don't always have the chance to leave at the right time when you're on-call. I did a quick Google Maps check. It said that if I leave at 7:45 I could catch a 7:57 bus that would take me almost straight to the school. I still wouldn't arrive until quarter to nine -- a bit later than I am technically supposed to show up, but on short notice it's sometimes difficult to be extremely punctual. I let my agency know that I would be a bit later, but still arrive before school started at 9:00. They said they would let the school know. All is going okay so far.

But then 7:57 rolls around, and the bus is nowhere to be seen. Whatever, sometimes they're a minute or two late... So I wait until 8:00. Nothing. 8:05. Still nothing. 8:10. Starting to seriously wonder why these buses even have timetables. I call my agency again, who are beginning to sound quite flustered, and they suggest I call a cab, as the schools don't like when teachers are late and will be less likely to request you again. Okay, mildly freaking out now. I call the first cab company, but they won't have anything until 9:00. I call the second, they don't have anything either. I call the third, and they won't have anything for another 25 minutes at least. The bus drives by as I'm on the phone. Okay, definitely freaking out now. I call my agency again, apologizing profusely. They tell me that it's okay, but they will need to find someone else to send that can get there sooner.

Great. I've let them down, let the school down, and now I won't have work today. I should have just hopped on my bike. Why didn't I just bike? I mean, no, I wasn't super confident on my cycling directions to get there and would have likely shown up moderately sweaty... But I probably could have at least made it on time. The walk back to my house felt a bit like a walk of shame.

A First Bus getting ready to make some people late -- An artistic rendering.

Surely this wouldn't have happened if I were a better teacher, more responsible, better at decision making under pressure. Right? Well, Yes and no. There is a well-known proverb that states "Shit Happens" and I choose to stand by those words. Sometimes, for whatever reason -- be it dumb luck or bad karma or what have you -- things just don't fall together in the way you would have hoped.

There is no way to account for all of the thousands of factors involved in a simple decision like 'how will I get to work today?'. It's easy to start playing mind games with yourself, such as "If I Had Only...", "Why Didn't I..." or the classic "Why am I Such an Idiot?". Especially if you're a chronic over-thinker like me. Would I have liked to work today? Yes. Am I disappointed? Yup. But I am going to suck it up, eat my chocolate pudding, and move on. Tomorrow, I will be ready again at seven AM. My bag will be packed, I'll be wearing my teacher clothes, and it will be a new day.


C.